Or, welcome to my low-maintenance heck.
Impersonating the Verizon representatives that Americans won't impersonate:
On the late morning of Wednesday, June 4, a 64-year-old Springfield woman and her live-in aide were the victims of a home invasion robbery. The home is located in the 6700 block of Metropolitan Center Drive.
Just before 10 a.m., the homeowner answered a knock at the door and met two men wearing "Verizon Wireless" long-sleeved shirts, and one of them holding a handgun, according to Fairfax County Police.
The woman's 21-year-old live-in aide was brought in from a bedroom, and both the victims' hands were tied, police said.
The victims were not hurt and the men took an undisclosed amount of cash, jewelry and electronics, police said.
The suspects were described as Hispanic men in their early 20s. One suspect was around 5 foot 5 inches tall, with dark hair and dark-colored eyes. His shirt with a logo was white.
The second suspect was 5 feet 10 inches tall with a medium build, wearing a skull cap, dark pants and sunglasses. His shirt with a logo was black.
It should be noted that Metropolitan Center Drive is the home of a low-income apartment building, and is also right across the Franconia/Springfield Parkway (which has a bit of a pedestrian problem
) from Springfield Mall, the massive decline of which I've discussed previously
. It is also right next door to the Franconia/Springfield Metro station, which one would've thought would be prime real estate for people who want to commute to the District.
Can you hear me now
Or would you rather keep pretending that illegal immigration (and its associated gang violence) doesn't affect Fairfax County?