Microsoft is apparently planning on launching a multimillion dollar marketing campaign to counter "negative perceptions" about Vista's bugginess. Not that Vista is buggy as heck or anything.
You can see a sneak preview of the new ad campaign over here, but I don't think it's nearly jazzy enough. Therefore, as a public service to the Less-Capable Software Company, I've decided to contribute my own effort to their campaign.

Vista: Slow, buggy, and spies on you
Mac: Best for people who don't understand computers, or are gay.
Linux: Kind of cool if you like tweaking computers, unless you enjoy video games.
XP: For the rest of us.