Mr. Sparkles.
I'd like to point out that Bashar al-Assad, who has exactly zero days of military experience, has as many ribbons on his uniform as the veteran in front of him. And, of course, he outranks him, as is to be expected of any tinpot dictator.
It's funny, though—For a serious military leader, his face has had more airbrushing than a Cosmo cover model.
I'm all scared 'n stuff!
holy crap!!! Is he mutating right in front of our eyes? His whole face is tilting. His eyes are pointing in different directions!
He looks like rainman finally allowed to watch Jeapordy.